Friday, August 10, 2018

Getting to Know Me


I just had a birthday last week and apparently at my age I’m still discovering who I am.  I’m not generally a people person and I always thought of myself as misanthropic, but it turns out that’s not really true. Maybe that isn’t news to some, but it shocked the hell out of me.

One of the things I liked about our daily walks at the dog park was that we didn’t see many people that early in the morning. The place had an air of solitude to it. And in cold weather, it could be anyone under all that clothing so there wasn’t a need for conversation. But as it got warmer and we could see who we were talking to, conversations inevitably happened. Now that’s a big part of my motivation to get up and make it there. When you see people every day, you start to get to know them, and in my case you start to like them. Some of them have even been to our house.

Another new thing I learned about myself is that I’m a person of faith.  I am deeply connected to nature and the universe around me. I suspect that I have experienced spirituality in a very different way from most. My beliefs don’t line up with organized religion but I don’t push it on others. What is true for me is probably not the truth for someone else.  And THAT is fine.

On my path of being a perpetual student of life, I’ve also learned to love and accept my shadow side; those parts of me that are human and perfectly flawed. Someone once held a mirror up to me and showed me that I am very hard on myself, even extremely so. One of the most difficult things I’m still learning to do is not sit in judgement of myself or others. I say still learning, because that’s one of those things few people master, and I know I have lots to learn.

Yet, I am grateful for each day that I’m given and eager for every lesson I continue to learn, even the hard ones. May they be instrumental in chipping away my ego, and smoothing out the rough edges leaving me a polished and better person.

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